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Title: Present Tense
Author: CloudyJenn
Fandom: Enterprise
Pairing: Archer/Reed
Rating: R
Beta: [livejournal.com profile] qzee
Disclaimer: These characters belong to Paramount. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.
Warnings: Strong language
Summary: It's Jon's birthday and Malcolm is nervous.
Author's Notes: Jessica helped a bit with this as well. Also, thanks to Qzee for helping me talk out a title. I suck at titles...sigh. Very sappy and fluffy. Enjoy!




Malcolm had always enjoyed seeing the stars from this point of view, in a stationary space ship. Out of the wide windows of the observation lounge, he could see thousands of stars, above and below and to either side. If he stood close enough to the window, he could almost believe Enterprise was just another star, hanging in the dark expanse of space, providing light and life for some distant civilization.

He sighed and turned away from the window. He had no doubt that Enterprise had plenty of light and life to offer; he just didn’t know if he could bring himself to accept it.

It was fairly dark in the lounge, the soft light filtering in from the stars creating long shadows across the couches and chairs. Malcolm went to one of the couches and flopped down on it, tossing aside the package he’d been carrying with him. It turned end over end a few times before coming to a stop a few feet from him, looking for all the world like an abandoned child. Malcolm scowled at it. Stupid, bloody, mocking package.

He hated the image he must be creating, even though there was no one around to see it. Malcolm wasn’t typically the type of person to hide away in a dark corner and have morose thoughts, but he just couldn’t help it on this particular occasion. He was reaching a snapping point and he honestly didn’t know what would happen when he did. Surely something that would get him a court martial.

And it wouldn’t be my fault, for fuck’s sake, he thought vindictively, making the transition from morose to pissed without even realizing it. He wasn’t the one that couldn’t keep his hands to himself, insisted on leaning close to others and asked far too personal questions. He wasn’t the one that smiled at people with a twinkle in his eyes and made other people feel like they were going to drown in those eyes.

Feeling rather childish, Malcolm picked up the package and threw it onto one of the chairs, out of his reach. He had no idea why he thought he would actually give that present to him. Especially at a party attended by almost the entire crew.

It was really the party that had been the final straw. Malcolm had endured the touching and the looking and the leaning as best he could for months now without breaking down and either slapping or kissing the man. But his behavior at the party had pushed Malcolm right to the very edge. And he had already been on edge, worrying about what he would think of the present and whether it was even a good idea to have gotten one for him in the first place.

It had been party for his birthday, a surprise from some of the more excitable members of the crew, led by Hoshi and Trip. He’d been totally surprised, which was a surprise in and of itself, given how much the crew gossiped amongst themselves. Malcolm couldn’t deny enjoying seeing the look on his face, his hazel-green eyes lighting up and his lips curving into a wide open grin.

That was the last time he’d been happy during the party. The Birthday Boy had decided that since it was his party, he could have whatever he wanted, including Malcolm plastered to his side for the duration. Trip and Hoshi had set up a table in the center of the room where the Captain could open the small offering of presents the crew had gathered for him. Malcolm could still hear Archer’s voice in his head, beckoning him to sit next to him.

Here Malcolm, I have a seat for you right here.

And he had patted the space to his left, a hopeful look on his face and Malcolm couldn’t say no, though he thought about it. The whole thing felt entirely too personal, less like a Captain talking his tac officer than a boyfriend talking to his lover. That was the thing that drove Malcolm crazy about Archer. When they weren’t on duty, Archer spoke to him in tones of familiarity, the tone of voice you might use to wake someone up in the morning or ask them if they’d remembered to buy milk. And it made Malcolm angry because he always woke up alone and he hadn’t bought milk in years. It was very hard to maintain distance from someone who seemed to already think of you as family.

And it was frustrating when you got to the point where you didn’t really want to maintain that distance, when you wanted to forget about rules and let yourself have that family.

Because Malcolm had gotten to the point where he knew without a doubt that that was what Archer was offering with those glances and touches. He hadn’t been sure at first, but it was now painfully obvious.

He stood up again and went to pick up the present. He hadn’t put it the pile with the others because he hadn’t been sure if he could give it to him in front of everyone. When Archer had pulled him down next to him in front of half the crew, he’d been sure he couldn’t. So, he had just sat there as long as he could stand it, trying to ignore the blazing heat melting into his side and was able to escape during the cake portion of the evening.

And now he was sitting here alone in an observation lounge, fuming about the fact that someone loved him and he felt like a stupid child.

“You are such an idiot, Reed,” he muttered to himself and threw the package back down. He walked back to the window, thinking he’d have a few more moments of stargazing before retiring for the evening. Before he reached the window, though, he heard the door behind him open.

Damn, he thought. Now he was going to have to make up a reason for being here that wasn’t completely pathetic.

“Malcolm?”

Bloody, fucking hell. Shit. Damn. Malcolm turned slowly. It was Archer, of course. The man had an inner Malcolm-dar.

“Captain.” He couldn’t even have a good pout about Archer without him showing up. There was no way he was going to get over this...this thing if Archer didn’t stop catching him at vulnerable moments.

“I thought I saw you slip out earlier. What are you doing here? Trip’s taking pictures. He asked after you.”

Don’t try blaming your stalking tendencies on Trip, Malcolm thought irritably. What he said aloud was much more polite.

“Yes, I was getting a bit tired. I thought I might have a look at the stars before going to bed.”

It wasn’t quite an untruth. Malcolm was very tired, though perhaps not in a physical sense. Archer gave him a long look, the kind that always made Malcolm feel so exposed. He’d never met anyone that could make him feel that way, like he couldn’t hide anything at all from him. And if that were true, if Archer really could see that much of him, the fact that he still pursued him was nothing short of a miracle, in Malcolm’s opinion. The thought lessened his frustration.

“What’s this?” Archer had walked further into the room and spotted the package Malcolm had been flinging around all evening. His stomach dropped violently. He’d totally forgotten about the damned present and there was no way Archer wasn’t going to guess what it was, considering how it was wrapped up neatly in brown paper and tied off with a bit of yellow ribbon Hoshi had lent him.

“It’s...er...” Archer’s face lit up as he reached down to pick it up.

“Is this a birthday present?” He sounded very excited, like a two-year that had just been presented with a large stuffed toy. Malcolm hadn’t realized it was possible to be embarrassed and charmed at the same time, but then, nothing involving Jonathan Archer was ever what he expected it to be.

“Well, yes, actually it is.”

Archer’s eyes shone, lancing right through Malcolm’s heart. Suddenly, all the annoyance and anger dissipated. He didn’t have it in him to be upset when Archer looked so happy. All he wanted now was to sweep across the room, gather the other man in his arms and kiss the hell out of him.

He didn’t, of course. But he did move closer to Archer, who had moved to sit on the couch, the present in hand.

“It is for me, right?” he asked with a trace of humor. Malcolm rolled his eyes as he sat beside him.

“No, it’s for Ambassador Soval. Would you mind giving it to him for me?”

Archer threw his head back and laughed, his Adam’s apple bobbing in a way Malcolm found far too interesting.

“I had no idea you two were so close, Malcolm,” he teased. "You don't mind if I just open it for him, do you?"

Malcolm shook his head, smiling. "Go ahead. I think you'll like it more than him anyway."

"Thank you. This is wonderful, Malcolm. I really wasn't expecting any presents at all," he explained with a smile. That didn't surprise Malcolm in the least. Archer was the type of person who would work overtime to make your birthday special without a thought to how you would make his special in return.

After what seemed like an eternity to Malcolm, Archer finally managed to get the package open, revealing a box with a transparent lid. And when he looked down into it, shock filling his green eyes, Malcolm thought his heart was going to burst right out of his chest. He felt jolt of embarrassment and wished he had hidden the package from view. It was silly, he shouldn't have presumed, Archer was going to think he was...

"Malcolm," Archer breathed, pulling the lid off the box and picking up the grayish blue stone. "How...how did you remember this? That leave was three months ago."

Heat crept up the back of Malcolm's neck. He knew he was being very obvious, but the pleasure of seeing Archer running his fingers over the stone's smooth glossy surface in wonderment was well worth the embarrassment. The stone had caught Archer's eye while the Captain, Trip and Malcolm were out one day exploring an alien city during the leave he'd mentioned. Malcolm could still remember the way Archer hadn't been able to take his eyes off the polished azure stone. He'd been so enamored of it that Trip teased him about it all afternoon. Malcolm thought for sure Archer would purchase it, but he'd left it behind, albeit reluctantly and so Malcolm had returned the following day and bought it for him. It had been his hope that he would be able to surprise and delight Archer in much the same way Archer had him on his first birthday on the mission and it looked like he'd gotten his wish.

"Well, you seemed to like it so much and I thought you should have it." Malcolm chanced reaching out to stroke the stone himself. "I'm glad I got it when I did. Apparently, it's very rare; they only had the one. The man in the shop said the stone's color represents bravery."

It'd seemed very appropriate. There were countless examples of the Captain's bravery, both in commanding Enterprise and in his own personal life. And once Malcolm had discovered what the stone meant, it had helped steel his resolve.

"Bravery," Archer murmured, sounding distracted. Malcolm raised an eyebrow at him.

"Sir?"

He surprised Malcolm by turning towards him, laying the stone in his lap, a very intent look in his eye. "Malcolm, do you know why I liked this stone so much?"

Actually, he didn't. It was lovely, of course, an interesting shade of blue, but other than that, it was just a stone. There were no intricate formations set in the side, like many Earth stones Malcolm found fascinating or any patterns carved into it. It was just a plain blue rock.

"Not really. I mean, it's quite beautiful," he added hastily, not wanting to offend Archer's preferences.

"It's gorgeous," Archer stated emphatically. "It was the color. This blue..." He looked back down at the stone, his fingers still stroking it lovingly. "This color's been haunting my dreams for months."

"I'm afraid I don't understand, sir." A color haunting his dreams? It didn't make sense. And suddenly, Malcolm felt like he wasn't sure he wanted to know. Hearing about Archer's dreams was just another step towards an intimacy he wasn't positive he could handle. Not without wanting it all.

"It's..." Archer paused, and then let a soft almost shy chuckle slip. "I know it's not, I shouldn't say things like this, but, hell, I'm sitting here with a bravery rock in my lap. I have to say it."

"Sir?"

"It's the color of your eyes, Malcolm."

Malcolm blinked. "My eyes?" Archer had been dreaming of...his eyes? For months?

"Yes." He held up the stone, moving his gaze slowly from it to the eyes in question. "It's...almost as beautiful a color." When Malcolm didn't reply, only stared at him, mouth slightly hanging open, Archer continued speaking quickly. "I saw it and I just couldn't stop looking at it and I knew if I got it, I could look at all I wanted, whenever I wanted. I didn't get it then because I was afraid it was too obvious, but when I went back to pick it up the next day, it was gone." He chuckled again and shook his head. "I can't believe you were the one who bought it."

"My eyes," Malcolm said again. Suddenly, the reaction he'd been holding back burst forth, amazement coloring his tone. "You think my eyes are beautiful?"

Archer shrugged slightly, absently tapping the stone. "I always have. They were the first thing I noticed about you."

"Oh, that's it!" Malcolm exploded. He'd been wrong earlier. The party wasn't the final straw. This was. Malcolm could fight against the touches and the person concern and the familiarity. But there was no other way to deal with Archer telling him he wanted to have something in his quarters that reminded him of Malcolm's eyes other than to give up and accept what fate was offering him.

"What's it?" Archer asked, alarmed.

"The first thing I noticed about you was your smile," Malcolm confessed abruptly, getting straight to the point.

"Yeah?" The smile in question grew slowly on Archer's face.

"Couldn't buy a smile rock though."

Archer nodded. "Ah yes," he mused. "Well, you could settle for the real thing."

"It would be easier." Malcolm picked up the rock and tossed it behind him, moving closer till his leg touched Archer's. "I know you like the stone, but if you wanted to have the real thing around some more, I could be persuaded."

"The stone's lovely; there's no doubt about that," Archer said, cautiously lifting his hand to stroke Malcolm's cheek, the wonderment back in his expression. "Now that I'm looking at you though...there's no contest."

Malcolm leaned his head into Archer's hand, placing his own on the other man's chest. "You know, if you wanted to look at me with abandon, you could have just asked."

"I have been," he replied. His thumb lightly rubbed over Malcolm's bottom lip. "Wasn't sure until today whether I was reading your answer right."

"My answer?" Focus, Reed, he scolded himself. "I don't think I was sure what that was myself until now." Sliding his hand up to Archer's neck, Malcolm paused a moment to enjoy the warmth of his skin. "I have been thinking about it a lot though. You've been very annoying."

Archer laughed. "Annoying? And here I was beginning to think you liked me."

"Oh, I like you. I like you very much," Malcolm assured him. "It's just been hard to ignore how much what with you..." He flapped his free hand through the air, trying to find the words. "Being you and all."

"Being my annoying self?"

"Being persistent."

"I knew there was merit in persistence," he murmured, catching Malcolm's free hand and threading their fingers together. Malcolm knew he could come up with an appropriate retort given time, but then Archer leaned into him and took his mouth in a deep open kiss. Any notion of further scolding flew out of his mind and he pulled him close, losing himself in the kiss, the only coherent thought in his head being to wonder why in heaven's name he ever thought he couldn't accept this.

After all, who was he to argue with fate...or persistence...or...

Archer gently bit his bottom lip and Malcolm stopped thinking altogether.

THE END

Date: 2006-12-03 12:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] evilleaper.livejournal.com
As always I am behind in my reading. Thank goodness for quiet Sunday mornings because I finally found some time to sit down and read your birthday fic. Love it. Very Malcolm and Jon. Thank you so much for sharing.

Date: 2006-12-03 08:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cloudyjenn.livejournal.com
Very Malcolm and Jon.

I'm glad you think so! Thank you for the lovely comments!

Jenn

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